Time Marches On

Wow I am really bad at keeping a blog during the summer. It’s kind of ironic, because I definitely have a lot more free time than I do during the school year. I think the problem is that my life is actually kind of boring during the summer months. I spent most of the month of June working and taking online classes, and during July I’ve been working and have actually gone home a few times to visit my family. Nothing super blogworthy.

I have also been maintaining a fairly steady dating life. I think last time I blogged about this I was talking about Mr. Chivalrous. That kind of fizzled before it even got going. I was a little bummed at first, but now it is NBD. I’ve gone out with a couple different guys and met someone who I am pretty excited about but I think I’m going to refrain from sharing too many details (call me superstitious but did I jinx things before?). I promise, I will keep you updated on how things play out with that situation (I do have a good story involving How I Met Your Mother and me drinking way too much, but like I said, I’m going to withhold details for the time being).

As far as things with C, I’m really starting to feel a distance from all of that. I think the wedding date being past was a major help. Before, I could talk about how much I was healing but I still had that speed bump to get through. Now the whole thing really is behind me. Before, when I met someone new I felt like I had to reveal that story almost immediately. I don’t feel that need for immediacy as much anymore. I also don’t feel the need to share as many of the gory details. All the new guy knows is that I was engaged, found out he was using meth, and dumped his sorry ass. Maybe if things progress I will tell him about the robbery and how awful the breakup was, but I don’t feel a need to now. It’s like those gory details used to be such a big part of who I was as a person that I couldn’t not share them. Now I’m starting to feel as if they were a huge part of someone I used to be, but I’m starting a new chapter so they are only a little part of what has made me the person I am today.

It’s funny, it’s been almost 6 months since I started this blog. I’m really glad I did it because I now have a chronicle of my survival of the worst breakup of my life. When I started the blog, I was having a tough time imagining the future. Every day was so painful to try and get through. I didn’t know if I would ever get to a place where I am now. I’m not going to sit here and say I’m completely healed and totally over the whole situation, but I’m sure as hell a lot better than I was before. And it feels pretty great to have gotten here.